summer workshop Day 1

OK. After getting access to my class rosters LATE last night, I got excited/scared/freaked out with the prospect of returning to school. Mostly, it's excited/anxious, especially the latter when I realize how little I have actually done to prepare for the new school year. Guess it's a bad idea to waste the summer by pretending to do work, huh? Should've definitely started this whole to-do list thing with Christina way earlier. It would also save a lot of emotional turmoil. Grrrr.

In any case, the rational me is almost completely back. I would say 90 percent. I have almost achieved inner closure, if not face-to-face closure, and am in a much more stable frame of mind. That doesn't mean, though, that bad thoughts sometimes come into my head. But that's off the record, right, James?

Today, for the first time since June 25, I woke up to two alarms, set 15 minutes apart, and snoozed for 30 minutes. It was NOT a pleasant experience even though I've been harping about how I want to go back to school. And the workshop today started at 9! I only had to wake up at 7:30 a.m. at the latest. I am pretty sure I will NOT be OK with my 5:30 a.m. wakeup calls in a week and a half.

Day 1 of the summer workshop was a little jarring. I went from no education-speak for two weeks and am now suddenly thrust into world of philosophical discussions over the merit of posting homework assignments online and the pros and cons in using the point system versus the percentage system in calculating homework grades. That is just 45 minutes of the five-hour workshop and does not include discussions over common curriculum and skills students should acquire by the time they end their freshman year.

Finally met my English partner today! Nobody even told me of his hire or presence or anything. Is this how it goes for the second year? I only knew because I walked in and saw a new person and deduced that he must be the new English teacher and therefore must be my new partner.

Did not write as therapy today. Rather, looked into entering another profession altogether. A profession that I have absolutely no chance in getting into and, the more I read, little chance of being successful at.

Tomorrow is another day! Hopefully one with no irrational thoughts so I can put this chapter of my life behind me and put it in the "life experiences" column. Maybe I will even roll my eyes and laugh in a few months ... yeah, more like a few years. It has been a bittersweet summer, to say the least.